People get stuck in difficult / unpleasant situations as they think they do not know how to get out of them. When we think different, we can easily chose different set of words and actions that could lead to different results.
First step is to manage your own thinking.
Start to believe that things can change.
Of’course certain things are beyond our control and hence are best left alone. We cannot directly control them and hence changing them is beyond us. Eg. The amount of rainfall in our city; Change of attitude of people in a day; the crowd at the railway station; Spouse agreeing to your ideas 100%; etc.
Self-awareness is the key to self-transformation. For awareness you need to observe self and people around. You need to keep your EEMO = Eyes, Ears and Mind Open.
When you observe yourself, you will realize what is happening to you and when. You will be able to identify a pattern / trend. And when you break that pattern / trend the next steps will be different as the sequence has been broken.
Eg. When one is angry, one may shout.
so when the urge to shout arises, deliberately soften your tone (lower volume) and stretch your dialogue (speak slowly). Automatically the anger level goes down and you regain your composure.
By changing you state, you change your health -- both physical and mental. You spread peace and love.
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